The Honorable ______________
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington DC, 20510
Dear Senator _________,
As a legal resident of these great United States, as
well as an excellent customer of the
Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your
assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland
Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming
an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
My primary reason for writing is wishing to change
my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the
bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which
you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is
accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United
States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen
is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the
last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am
anxious to get the process started before everyone figures
it out.
Simply put, those of us who have been here legally
have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the
prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying
a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be
illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result
for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and
2005.
Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin
using the local emergency room as my primary health care
provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical
insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000
a year.
Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be
that my daughter would receive preferential treatment
relative to her law school applications, as well as
"in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the
United States for my son.
Lastly, I understand that illegal status would
relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and
making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very
important to me given that I still have college age children
driving my car.
If you would provide me with an outline of the
process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and
copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.
Thank you for your assistance.
Your Loyal Constituent,
____________________________
City , State
